Missing the Messiah

I was at Wonderland rehearsal on Saturday morning. Wonderland is New Life's annual Christmas production. It's huge. Literally there are hundreds of people involved. It can be a bit....um, long, at best, however during the all too familiar "Nativity scene", I was struck by something so profound, almost to the point of tears, as the "wise men" brought gifts to the baby Jesus.

The majority of the world missed the Messiah. With the exception of a few shepherds, and a couple of wise men, the world missed the single most important event in its history. The all-powerful God, sent His Son, a picture of Himself, in human form to the world, and we missed it. We missed in part, because we didn’t expect the King of the universe to send His son to a crappy little town and ordain for him to be born in a barn. But I think the biggest reason we missed it, is the reason I wanted to cry on Saturday.

And the reason is, we did not recognize Him. The God that the Jews had been serving for thousands of years, who had promised them a Messiah, whom they believed they knew intimately, at last fulfills that promise, and most of them had no idea.

If you read through some of the Old Testament books, Deuteronomy for example, God seems to be rather strict, driven by rules and regulations, and easily angered. In those days, if you married a woman and found out later that she wasn’t a virgin, you had every right to take her out and stone her.

How could that be the same God who, when presented with a woman caught in adultery, says to onlookers, “You who is without sin, cast the first stone” and then proceeds to tell her that she is free to go? No wonder the Jews didn’t recognize Him! To them he seemed heretical! Yet somehow, it was the same God. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

But this causes me to stop and think: “Would I have recognized Him?” I know I get so caught up in my safe little version of Christianity, a world in which I follow the rules and things generally go ok. I go to church, sing in the choir, work at a Christian radio station, and live my life as if I really know who Jesus is. But do I really? Do I have so many preconceived notions, but in reality, have no idea who He really is? Would I recognize the Messiah if I met Him on the street tomorrow? Or would I just think He was crazy, and in no way fitting in my box of “safe Christianity”? Would I even think Jesus was a Christian? Or would I be ready to crucify him along with the rest of the “crazies”?

I think I’m ready to meet the real Jesus. Whoever that is. However “unsafe” He might be. However much He may not fit into my box.

Jules

This is for Julie. Hey there friend! Julie is my Panera buddy. We meet there at least twice a week to have coffee, a brownie, a bagel, and all of the gory, mundane, yet dramatic details of our lives. Thanks for listening, and mostly being available on the spur of the moment.

iTunes

Hey I just got a new laptop (yes, the reason for the overhwelming number of blogs recently...all 3 of them) and iTunes. Welcome to the 21st century, Lisa. I want your top 5 suggestions of songs I should download. Please, comment.

Ready, go.

Elizabeth and Cinderella

I spent a weekend at the lake with my family in August. Always a good time. Getting some sun, sleeping in (well, sort of), eating good food, water sports, etc. It's so weird to see my cousins getting older, listening to cooler music than me, having more relationship experience than me, and become better looking. When did that happen?

My youngest cousin, Elizabeth, is a beautiful, brown eyed, brown haired (haired?), spunky 4-year old. She's smart and funny and even a bit sarcastic. It's possible she also has more relationship experience than me, but let's not get depressed.

She is also very much in a "princess" phase. She wants to watch princesses, be a princess, play with princess Barbie, dress like a princess, and maybe even act like a princess. She asked me to sit with her and watch Cinderella, the Disney classic. If I turned my head for even a second to look at something other than the t.v. during the course of the movie I was reprimanded: "Lisa, watch!!" She was glued to the t.v., holding her Barbie, asking me to hold Ken, and we were to make the dolls mimic the cartoon characters. She was in it.

I love Cinderella as much the next girl, but it was fascinating to watch her fascination with the movie. How is it that a 4-year old girl can already be caught up in the fairy tale? From such a young age, she has bought in to the whole story hook, line and sinker. No wonder it can feel like we're single for such a long time. We've been waiting for Prince Charming (or Cinderella) since we were 4. That's 20 years for me!

I watched the film with a bit different perspective this time. A beautiful girl is hidden away by an evil power, with a beautiful heart, a true servant, that no one fully appreciates or even sees. Until...the day. When he sees her. Truly sees her. The way no one has ever seen her. He sees something in her, in a moment of true destiny, from across a huge room, and goes after her. He doesn't care what anyone thinks. He doesn't care if he's making a fool of himself. He's found her. He asks her to dance, she accepts, and she feels so sublimely happy that she isn't sure if she's dreaming. It's too wonderful. Too perfect. So she runs, because she is afraid.

But it doesn't matter. Because now that he's found her, he'll do anything to find her, to win her heart. He needs her to know that he is safe. He can be trusted. He'll send someone to every house in Colorado to find the pair of perfect feet, that will fit the perfect shoe, that belong to the perfect girl...for him.

Lord! No wonder we get so disappointed! Who could ever live up to that?

This time around, I realized that is exactly what Jesus does. He notices something valuable about us, despite our disheveled appearance, and asks us to dance. And he comes after us even if we run because we're afraid. I know it seems a bit cheesy to be all "Oh Jesus is my prince charming!". Annoying, but there is a bit of truth in it. He does see the value in us, despite our cleaning clothes, and he wants to dress us up and take us to the castle and live happily ever after. Maybe we just don't know a good thing when we already have it...

Say goodnight and go

I'll just give a big Colorado welcome to myself after a long hiatus from the world of internet blogging. Yes, Colorado. That's where I live now. People ask me why I moved back; my ansewer? "Why not?" This is the type of thing you're supposed to do when you're 24, have no significant other, illegitimate children, or any semblance of clue of what to do with your life. Mountains? Why not? 105 degrees and humidity? No thanks.

I have a hard time making major decisions in my life often times. I struggle so much with figuring out The Thing I'm Supposed to Do, seeing my life's journey as a tight rope I have to try and balance, staying exactly on The Path of Destiny. The older I get (yeah, so I'm only 24), the more I realize that it is so much more a Choose Your Own Adventure book. This explains so much why I create so much stress for myself. As a kid, when I read those, I had to know every single possible conclusion. I had to read every adventure, know everything that could possibly happen in order to choose the best adventure. Real life does not work that way, however, which is a good thing!

I have to learn to just DO something. Be ok with making a mistake. I think it is foolishness (and perhaps even prideful) to think that we can always make the best decision all the time. I could have stayed in Texas and worked at Geico, or I could move to Colorado with no job and hope things turned out for the better. And they HAVE! God provided an amazing job for me within a week of being here; a job I really enjoy. What a novel concept. I could never have known what lied ahead had I not just packed up my car and started driving. I also think that I could have stayed in Dallas, worked at Geico, and probably been fine. But not quite as happy. I just don't want to live my life looking back, wondering "what if....".

I heard someone say the other day that there is a reason the windshield is bigger than the rearview mirror. Look forward! Choose your OWN adventure! Trust that God is right along with you, ready to take the adventure with you, to bless, to provide, to delight, just because you're His.

Insecurity

I've been thinking a lot lately about insecurities. We all have them. There are at least a few things that I can think of right now that I am insecure about. To be insecure (according to Webster's dictionary) is 1 : not confident or sure : UNCERTAIN . I'm not confident about my cooking ability. I've made one too many chocolate cakes with peanut oil or thought the recipe called for 1 cup of salt instead of a teaspoon. I don't know what it is; do I forget how to read? Come down with a temporary vision impairment ? Imagine for a moment that I'm cooking for a hundred people instead of just one?

Whatever it is, it has caused me to, over time, to more and more hesitant to cook for anyone. Potluck? I'll bring a bag of chips or something. Part of it is that my sister (who shall remain unnamed, but you know who you are), was always more proficient in the kitchen than I was. She was in there making up her own chocolate chip cookie recipe while I was cleaning my eye glasses or something else equally lame. All through college I managed to escape the art by either eating out way more than I should (thank you Taco Cabana) or sticking a hot pocket in the microwave. (I must add at this point that in my very first apartment I tried to cook a frozen pizza on my second day of newfound independence. I started a small fire. Perhaps they should require you to have a license of some sort to even preheat an oven.)

Over the years I've attempted and eventually mastered a few recipes. But please don't ask me to branch out. I think I can cook about 3 different meals now. If I rotate them, my husband will never notice. Every once in awhile I'll throw in some cookies (freshly cut from their frozen package) and he'll be content.

Anyway, that was not the point. The point of all this...is insecurity. And how eventually, insecurities, if not managed, can alienate you from those you love. If you are not confident in who you are, and the abilities that God has blessed you with, you will always be looking for other people to validate you. I've begun to realize that many people, single girls especially, seem to have a plethora of insecurities that we somehow hope our husband will make us feel better about, or we live in constant fear that he'll someday discover that we're not as great as he first thought and eventually become bored. If we don't first discover our identity and find our confidence in the Lord, we will live a life in the shadow of self-doubt and insecurity.

I'm not saying that one should walk around and pretend they're perfect, but simply try and see ourselves as the Lord sees us, and learn to be confident and content with who He's made us to be. Recognize our faults as well as our talents, and live a life unfettered by the chains of self-doubt. Realize that no one will ever completely satisfy us, other than the Lord, and stop looking for others to make us feel complete.