Insecurity

I've been thinking a lot lately about insecurities. We all have them. There are at least a few things that I can think of right now that I am insecure about. To be insecure (according to Webster's dictionary) is 1 : not confident or sure : UNCERTAIN . I'm not confident about my cooking ability. I've made one too many chocolate cakes with peanut oil or thought the recipe called for 1 cup of salt instead of a teaspoon. I don't know what it is; do I forget how to read? Come down with a temporary vision impairment ? Imagine for a moment that I'm cooking for a hundred people instead of just one?

Whatever it is, it has caused me to, over time, to more and more hesitant to cook for anyone. Potluck? I'll bring a bag of chips or something. Part of it is that my sister (who shall remain unnamed, but you know who you are), was always more proficient in the kitchen than I was. She was in there making up her own chocolate chip cookie recipe while I was cleaning my eye glasses or something else equally lame. All through college I managed to escape the art by either eating out way more than I should (thank you Taco Cabana) or sticking a hot pocket in the microwave. (I must add at this point that in my very first apartment I tried to cook a frozen pizza on my second day of newfound independence. I started a small fire. Perhaps they should require you to have a license of some sort to even preheat an oven.)

Over the years I've attempted and eventually mastered a few recipes. But please don't ask me to branch out. I think I can cook about 3 different meals now. If I rotate them, my husband will never notice. Every once in awhile I'll throw in some cookies (freshly cut from their frozen package) and he'll be content.

Anyway, that was not the point. The point of all this...is insecurity. And how eventually, insecurities, if not managed, can alienate you from those you love. If you are not confident in who you are, and the abilities that God has blessed you with, you will always be looking for other people to validate you. I've begun to realize that many people, single girls especially, seem to have a plethora of insecurities that we somehow hope our husband will make us feel better about, or we live in constant fear that he'll someday discover that we're not as great as he first thought and eventually become bored. If we don't first discover our identity and find our confidence in the Lord, we will live a life in the shadow of self-doubt and insecurity.

I'm not saying that one should walk around and pretend they're perfect, but simply try and see ourselves as the Lord sees us, and learn to be confident and content with who He's made us to be. Recognize our faults as well as our talents, and live a life unfettered by the chains of self-doubt. Realize that no one will ever completely satisfy us, other than the Lord, and stop looking for others to make us feel complete.